Author Archives: lautrec

The Only Person That I Can Ever Change Is Me

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Milepost .... (or half a mile post)

Milepost .... (or half a mile post)

 
My prescription for peace within myself and within the world is simply that: Focus on the only thing that we can ever change: ourselves.

Yesterday, I listened to a friend telling me what a horrible day she had one day this week and that’s all I could think of the while she told the story: The only person I can ever change is me. She told me how horrible this person had treated her and how wrong it was for anyone to act that way and how that person will never learn if someone doesn’t tell them they can’t behave that way. So she proceeded to file a complaint with her boss to prove to her how wrong she was. The lady was horrified for being turned in and to get back at my friend, she returned her Christmas present the next day. My friend was very proud of herself for standing up for herself and for what was right.

As I listened I realized that the hurt in this case was caused not by the lady who was mean, but by my friend who turned the lady’s actions into hurt inside her own heart. This “mean lady” did not take that hurt and place it inside of my friend’s heart, soul or mind. My friend made her own hurt and then was proud of what she had done.

In looking at this situation from the outside, it was easy to see the mistakes that my friend had made. It is not so easy when it is my own life that I am talking about with my own arguments and my own “nasty people” to deal with. The truth is still the same however. I cannot change the behavior or attitudes of anyone around me. I can only change how I react to others. I can only choose to change myself and not anyone else. I can take responsibility for my own emotions and my own happiness and my own life. For this I am grateful.

The quandary here however is how to tell my friend that I think she is wrong and that she is setting herself up for more hurt and more pain. Am I not trying to change my friend by telling her that I think she is wrong?

Walking in Winter December . 20 . 2008

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Winter Walk in the Snow . Christmas in NJ 2008

Winter Walk in the Snow . Christmas in NJ 2008

I am eternally grateful to be surrounded by such natural beauty. This is a photo I took on my walk today. Because of the heavy snow I abbreviated my five mile walk to a two mile walk. In this crunchy snow, that was still quite a feat.

 

I found an incredible storehouse of knowledge today on a website called TruthBeKnown.com that explores comparative religions and religious myths. I warn you, if you have any interest in this field, you might get lost for hours like I did.

 

The other day, I also found an incredible site called Bibliodyssey. It is an incredible collection of book illustrations from across the ages. Once again, be prepared to get lost. It is a wonderful resource for artists and illustrators.

Guided Meditations With Sandra Taylor

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Fall Mandala: Mandala created from leaf photo processed with kaleidoscope tool in Paint Shop Pro

Fall Mandala: Mandala created from leaf photo processed with kaleidoscope tool in Paint Shop Pro

I have never been very good with meditations. It either puts me to sleep or becomes an exercise in reviewing a list of all of my problems in my head that only makes me more tense and less focused. This changed recently when I ran across an archived radio show from Sandra Taylor on HayHouse Radio.

Sandra has a gift of making you very comfortable with yourself with her and the entire process. To access the archives on Hayhouse, you will have to become a member of the site, but it is truly worth it.

Become The Story You Create

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Cabbage: A Natural Mandala

Cabbage: A Natural Mandala

Today I was doing my morning reading of the New York Times when an article by Judith Warner caught my eye that reminded me of a conversation that I was just having with a friend about her daughters and her inability to keep their problems from becoming hers. I ran across this jewel that I think has a wonderful message for us all today:

“We fuse with the words we use,” the psychologist Keith Saylor told me last week. “We become the story we create. And there’s a story being created about who your child is.”

Of course Dr. Saylor was talking about our relationships with our children but the same principle applies to how we think about ourselves and our lives and what we manifest or create in our daily lives.

I am grateful that I can now manifest and create wonderful things in my own life and that I choose to create love, peace, beauty, wisdom and understanding in my world.

Gratitude . Walking . Affirmations . Healing

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Rocks . Road . Fall

Rocks . Road . Fall

As I look back on this past year I know that one of these three things have saved my life: Gratitude, Walking and Affirmations. They have helped me heal and led me to new ways of thinking and living. I am very grateful for the change in my life.

The gratitude keeps me in a spirit of acceptance of what I have and who I am.

The walking just keeps my mind clearer and my body stronger. The visual stimulation that I get everyday from the scenery has helped me get back to my love of nature and it has inspired me to draw again.

The affirmations help me to reach out to the future and to possibilities and to others. I not only affirm good things for myself, but I affirm good things for my family and my friends. My affirmations for my loved ones at this point are manifesting themselves in amazing ways. I am growing in my ability to make affirmations for myself and to make them come true.

My healing has been helped along by all these things and by the help of my family and friends. My healing has been helped by Louise Hay, Deepak Chopra, Ernest Holmes and others. I am grateful for the journey that I began about a year ago. I am grateful that I have been transformed.

I am Strange and that is Good

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Strange . Unique . Odd . Wonderful

Strange . Unique . Odd . Wonderful

On my walk for the past few days I have been working on accepting myself just as I am. I have been celebrating and affirming my Self in every way. I spent decades trying to be like others or wishing that I could be more like other people or fit in better with the rest of the world. What a waste of time. I am myself and that is my gift to the universe. I choose to use my talents, my intelligence, my perspective, and my love to make the world a better place.

I am Strange and that is Good! I am grateful for who I am. All is well!

Celebration of Manifestation

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November Sunset In New Jersey on the Delaware River

November Sunset In New Jersey on the Delaware River

Today I celebrate the manifestation of my affirmations of the past several months in the life of someone very dear to me. I am grateful that the universe has heard my plea. I am grateful for the new opportunities and new relationships that are coming into being at this very moment in time.

The photograph above was taken on my abbreviated walk today. I got started a bit late and the sun goes down very early right now, but the good thing about it is that I was at this spot, at this beautiful moment in time, with my camera.

Life is good!

Movements

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Fall Weave

Fall Weave

As the season progresses into late fall, it is amazing to watch the colors, textures and forms of nature change everyday. It reminds me that nothing is ever static or frozen and that I must shift and move with nature and never get stuck or frozen.

I have also been thinking allot about mind control. I seem to be moving beyond being careful to remain positive to just telling myself that I do not have the time to be depressed or to entertain morbid or self defeating thoughts.

My walk today was very difficult physically. I got a mile down the path and wanted to turn back just from the pain I felt in my legs, but I knew that it was important for my spirit, my emotions, my mind and my body that I just keep going and complete my 5 mile walk.

Celebrating 50 Years of Life

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50: A number not to be feared

50: A number not to be feared

Today is my 50th birthday and I choose to celebrate my own survival and prosperity this day. I claim every good thing for myself. I look forward to a whole new decade of discovery and growth. I thank the universe for helping me to get over my self [self and negative perceptions of my personality and place in the world] and my obsession with failure and poverty. I embrace my new world. I embrace my own personal “new age”.

I thank Louise Hay for helping me to get here. I thank my mother and my father and my entire family for their love and wisdom. I thank my life partner for being here for me and holding my hand for the past year while I walked through the dark valley of my own making in my own despair and self hatred. I am a wonderfully lucky and blessed man. I am grateful for my father’s visit this past summer and his acceptance and love for me. I am grateful for a roof over my head, food in my refrigerator and cupboards, opportunities surrounding me in every direction, for political freedom, the chance to run my own business, the health to be able to walk 5 miles a day, for stopping smoking this year, for wonderful new destinations that I have discovered, and the blessings of technology that make the Internet and this blog possible.

Turning fifty years old is not scary at all. It is the fear of turning fifty that is really scary. It is a fear that can destroy you; It is a fear that can drive you crazy, but only if you let it. Embrace the possibility of this moment and your future. Embrace The Concept and The Reality of Now.